Why we have to stop saying “smash the patriarchy”

The problem isn’t just the “patriarchy.”

You’ve heard this, yes? That the patriarchy is the problem with our society and culture. Well, yes and no. Because doing away with a patriarchical model won’t really do anything if we don’t learn to operate in an entirely new framework.

In college, graduate school, and my early days as a professional, I remember looking around me countless times and not wanting the lives or jobs of the women who went before. I specifically remember sitting with a high level administrator at a University I worked at, looking at her calendar, and asking her, “Well, where is there room for you? For actual work? For your family?” She laughed. A few years later she stepped down from that role due to health issues and a realization that she desired to be with her family more.

You don’t need a severe health crisis to give you the wake up call that it’s you who needs to make a change. We can’t wait for the patriarchy to just dissolve. We have to build anew, and understand what matriarchy actually means. What feminine and masculine actually mean (and btw, neither is inherently toxic) and that we need both.

I get incredibly frustrated when we see, “We need more women in power! More women in roles like _________.” Not necessarily. Yes, for representation, but if they’re operating in the same toxic patterns as male counterparts - i.e. over-working, forcing, power hungry, zero boundaries, scarcity mindset, putting profits over people, and work over loved ones - then it’s just more of the same women or not.

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Shakti [Sanskrit] - divine feminine power

Shakti is an energetic force in the yoga and tantric lineages of which I am a part. When I encountered Shakti years ago, I thought power was all the same. Power = dominance, control, wealth, others fearing you, etc. No, that’s a toxic expression of power.

As I began to explore Shakti, I began to realize her complexities, the freedom this energy brings, and her playfulness. It’s why there are so many personifications in the ancient yogic and Hindu myths! Lakshmi, Durga, Bhuvaneshvari, Sita, Kali, they all represent the essence of Shakti.

Shakti is (adapted from Sally Kempton’s work):

• The power to be concious and experience consciousness

• The power to feel ecstasy and pleasure

• The power of will or desire

• The power to intuitively know from the heart + the body (without books or more knowledge or logic)

• The power to act on your desires and inspire action around you

Shakti is an embodiment of the divine feminine that we feel resonate in our bodies, not our minds…at least not at first.

The divine feminine is:

• Trusting the flow of our lives in all aspects (personal, professional, romantic, etc.)

• Creativity

• Receiving nourishment and ease

• Embracing feelings and bodily sensations

• Engaging in deep thought and conversation

• Allowing inspiration to arise, rather than forcing it

• Nurturance, nourishment, and embracing an abundant approach to life

• a Fierce, a warrior spirit, recognizing destruction brings rebirth

Shakti is the embodiment, the energy of the feminine and yet has nothing to do with feminism or female power nor does it reside in only female identified bodies. No. It is within us all. And, without the feminine, the divine masculine cannot exist. Hence, the patriarchy as we know it.

We have GOT to get out of the too much to do, be more productive, hustle our way through life, accomplishment = worth, manage our time better, just “being grateful,” and shrugging our shoulders at our luck. How does that really feel in your body? In your heart? Listen: We make our luck.

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So, how do we learn to embody, encourage and nurture Shakti? How do we get into our own alignment and step into ease, fulfillment, calm, clarity, and allowing our desires?

You know what I’m going to say. We start with learning about our own Koshas, all the layers of our beings and assessing the health of each (the physical, energetic, emotional, intuitive, and blissful). We connect with the elements in nature and recognize how they work through us and for us (nature is a pure representation of the feminine - it never hurries and everything gets done - Lao Tzu). We stop making excuses for our patterns and accepting a way of living that may be “status quo,” but that isn’t your status quo.

We don’t dismantle a predominantly patriarchal system, knock down the walls and look at each other and realize, “Now, what?” No, we consciously build anew. As Trygon in the Circe tale says, Make another. Not more of the same.

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The Living Lush mentorship will cover ALL of this. And, the pre-sale ends on Thursday at midnight. If you’re on the fence, it’s time to get off of there, book the call, and if it feels like a full body YES, join us. We need the truth of who you are and your desires in the world.

The next time I share the mentorship, the price will go up by a $1000 or more (post baby #2’s arrival, of course!). That’s how good I know it is. I will also not be taking on new one on one yoga therapy clients for the forseeable future, including after my maternity leave. Mentorship and group experiences are where my heart is, where the magic is, and I’m honoring that.

Talk soon.
With love,
Leanne

Photo by Oliver Pacas on Unsplash